My Puma shoes all worn out..Trek to Triund

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My Puma shoes all worn out and the grip smooth-en out; after the weary trek to Gallu waterfall; My chum all forcefully trying to gushout, I was almost certain I wouldn’t be daring the Triund trek out there alone.
I was left with exploring the self content town of Mcleodganj. A walk around the market chowk, with more or less similar design and pattern of things to offer, soon enough I realized I didn’t have much left to do. With two more days left for the Dharamshala International Film Festival 2017, for which I had my reasons to come here.
I messaged to Tom Brazier who I befriended while on my solo trek to Gallu waterfall and Thank God I found him and Apoorva on my way to give me company. Tom encouraged me and inspired me to imagine the view from the top of Triund. The scenic view flashed my mind but most importantly my own strength needed to be tested. I had reasons to feel old because of my weak knees and I thought let’s jerk them a little and see how far I could sustain. I packed few essentials that night, though still doubtful in my mind.
By 7am the next day I left my guest house (Shree Guest House- an amazing discovery in the main market yet aloof to the noise, bought a pack of bourbon and tucked an auto ride to Himalaya Tea stall for 70 bucks. I had a cup of tea there and started my trek at 7.45am towards Triund. Being alone I had downloaded an offline map, Map.Me to assure me time to time if I was trailing the right path. 45 mins of gradual steep hiking I reached the Gallu Devi temple and that’s where I thought of writing my thoughts and experience down. I realized no matter how irreligious I may have turn, at this height you do want the Devi shakti to guide you, give you strength and protect you. Few meters from the temple I decided to rent a bamboo stick from the Sun and Moon cafe for 50 bucks and extra 50 as deposit. The cafe guide assured me that I would be just fine with my spare sandals. I then was asked by a peeping face from another booth, how many people were there with me and I said ‘alone’. He was from the police department and said that he needed to do my registration. I gave him my details and indulged into small talks with him- he didn’t need much to convince me that I should camp there on triund. I thus resumed my trek and on the way met few people who were impressed for me being alone to trek. I felt nice, of course and wondered many a things by now until I reached the magic view cafe by 10.45am:
– why I don’t have a dream list and it would have really made me go all out to accomplish them. This trek was not a dream but it’s happening with spur of my impulse.
– Why does one have the compulsion to uncharted way.
– what sounds from the valley could still reach that height and how did it make me feel. I heard the drum beats of probably a march past drill practice of some school and a flood of associated memory floated by.
– Does the birds out here liked it much or with the settlements down there.
– Why did the tiny houses looked ugly and disruptive to the green velvet spread of the oak canopy.
– The brands I left behind and those that I carried along with me.
– The decisions I made out of practical reasons and how happy was I for deciding on them.
– why is it much more friendlier, warm and encouraging with few of us who we meet up there on the mountains?

Anyways with these thoughts in my mind, I had the last 1.30 mins of trek left which was quite steep in comparison, and that’s where the real test begins. By around 1.30pm I reached the Triund campsite and buoy what a sight. The clouds descended enveloping the campsite and restricting the view to just few meters. The whole of Dhauladhar ranges was being wrapped away as if a child wrapped in a shawl not letting a glimpse of its face. Listening to the baa of the sheep yet not able to see them was a mysterious experience in moist cloudy wrap around. The whole scene was out of this world experience and need no further vividness as I would definitely fail to express.

I still have hope when you want to know how did it go.

Where is freedom to be found?

All that is a result of cause and effect;

All that we want to hold on to;

All that is there in life because of a  reason;

Are infact the answer to insecurity in our life.

And we thought, it is that relationship we could lead our life with. Think, how much we have to sacrifice our freedom to like and dislike without a second thought. The theory of motivation wouldn’t hold true for any other give and take bidirectional effort than our relationships.And of course it is not for the one who is reading this blog but for the person standing on the other front as well. Every move is an equation tried to be solved. Every behavioral dynamics showcased is a result of future outcome imagined in mind. How could life be a new morning each day? How could the rising of the Sun be different and unpredictable and hence beautiful?

Not to forget the job that we work in. The stakes are higher and nastier. For, our survival instincts are dependent on it. All those etiquette, perfectionism, punctuality, feedback, attitude, expectations, parameters and et all; who are they for? The whole orientation is locus-ed around the environment.

The whole societal existence is a fake string of tug of war. What is freedom and where is it? A eclipse surely is an answer. The moon doesn’t need to be bright and the Sun doesn’t need to rise everyday. It is we who are dependent, so it is we who have to find the answer.

– Anuradha Bansal

Life- A puzzle…

Why ‘Majoritarianism’ is like a pejorative and not a cult?

So the way to be chosen is not the less taken by as Robert Frost has hailed since 1920. Our judgment without a hint of guilt is towards the majority. Convenience has become a word of grey humiliation- something that we subconsciously know but our conscious mind hasn’t discovered it yet. Even the others aren’t in the mood to forcefully make us submissive about. Just like the blind spot of the Johari Window. Sorry to be tempted to use the jargon which might appear so, to those who aren’t aware of psychological topics. But then if you are reading this, you would have a reason to further search for this term online. It would definitely be worth your time.

Our course of direction is always based on the bed layered upon by those on the majority foreground. Perspective is about sensing angles. So if I may say that majority has got much to do with sheep herding, it wouldn’t please all. The empirical technique could probably sensitize the conditioned brain to even care a listening ear. Copernicus’s theory of heliocentric wouldn’t have been ever discovered and we would still have been thinking and mind just thinking that Sun revolved around Earth. It took Thomas Henry Huxley to courage the assertion of the hypothesis that Apes and Humans evolved from a common ancestor. Why should I even persuade when your intuition knew it would have been better the other way.

We have decayed away the thoughts of those who have dared to think a thought differently. Society is an unsaid rule developed over time by those few who could style it differently. Now there could be several reasons to it- class, strength, conviction, medium, model, societal structure. Van Gogh palette wouldn’t have discovered bright colors had he not been to France to feel the bright sunlight than the earthy tones while he was in Belgium. It is a matter of exposure and not our close doors that we survive within, they even shape our aims and goals. Even the formalization of education is setting of boundary, not allowing the true education of observance.

Geert Hofstede even covered ‘individualism aspect’ in his cultural dimension model. Though it isn’t exactly what we proclaim but it does show the effect of society, in the way one shapes one’s thoughts and attitude. A highly logical mind thus wouldn’t follow the comfort of herd ship but the conviction of a true honest mind. Standing tall and not fear the loss, for it isn’t a loss. And to end it, as Robert Frost wrote:

……

” Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.”

 

– Anuradha Bansal

6 Reasons why being a perfectionist is a bane than a boon:

Being a perfectionist has been considered a virtue and those moral police would always advocate a perfectionist with utter regard. While watching the movie ‘Lakshya’ (2004) I got the high when there was a scene between Hrithik Roshan and Amitabh Bacchan regarding the placement of the painting on the wall. We have written great verses in praise of those who are. But the wonderment is what goes behind being a perfectionist?

Have you found people complaining about those perfectionist rude who are death slow? I have an example to share- A friend of mine would always speak about her relative being nice and all but the only reason she would have the expression of distaste was when she would think about her perfect shot of work. So though a perfectionist could be praised for being Mr Rahul Dravid but it is Mr Yuvraj Singh who would get those fast runs on the cricket ground. Here are my reasons how  being a perfectionist could be a bane than a boon:

1. Your Ego gets precedence over your relationships– The perfectionists are idol ideals. They believe in giving their all to those they knot with and expect the same. The sheer disappointment comes into play when you cannot accept any deviation from the median on the graph.
2. You wouldn’t be measurably reliable as your quality cannot be compromised– you would have back pipers snaring away the thought of you when it comes to get you into the pitch for that critical urgent care ward.
3. You would have major issues with time management– you would see yourself procrastinating task out of overwhelms. Tasks would either seem too easy or just too difficult for you to handle and because you always give your best shot, your head wouldn’t be ready to jump on the wagon until you are rest assured of its best picture.
4. Delegation would get a mar– As trusting others to do the task as good as you would be a thing of experimentation. And because things should be shaped no less than Lenardo Da Vinci’s sculptors, you wouldn’t want to experiment with a helping hand at disposal.
5. Life would be full of stress for you– getting distressed over every few minute details makes life numb and dumb to the outside environment. You would be a hard taskmaster without a smile and people would not for sure want to team up with you.
6. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)– Whether it is OCD turn perfectionist or a perfectionist turn OCD is a thing of undying debate just like who came first egg or chicken. The point is perfectionists are on the edge of being obsessive and compulsive in their action. Depression isn’t far away too should you find yourself not meeting your own set standard.

It’s in our conditioning to think being a perfectionist as the contender of the best self actualized man that we could turn into. It surely isn’t human to waste our life aiming ideals. Being mindful and attentive to our work is important however attaching our belief in the idealistic is a flaw. Rest it is definitely one’s choice of life.

– Anuradha Bansal

 

Are you holding the book too close?

You of course cannot read the book that is placed too close by. Likewise a flower would give you pollen fits when inserted to your nose, instead of giving pleasure to your olfactory nerves. When we can understand such simple facts then what is it about our relationships that are so daunting?

Home means comfort, secured environment, a brain hard code association to protection and Maslow’s one of psychological needs. So why is it that tempers fly, clash, and break under its roof. I guess that’s where the hot waves generate the most.

Relationship dynamics is the most intimidating politics that one plays. It is much far ahead than the usual politics. The mythology trace back to Mahabharata stands as the most epic political set up known. There’s no challenge to over seat it as yet.

There’s several way that we corrupt, estimate extremities, take in for granted or abuse our relationships. If you have already understood the flaw and is ready to work towards it, then here’s what we can do to give it a try.

Your consciousness: People often complain that their partner isn’t the same that they had fallen for. Over time circumstances change real time, so does one’s expectations and allied responsibilities. We fail to examine the layers and empathize the change. People do change and they have to, in conformance to the law of nature. Change is inevitable but being ‘you’ is not tough. The problem is in expecting the other person to change according to our wish. How insensitive we could be to curb one’s freedom, enslave them into manipulations and our own insecurities. ‘Our relationships are infact mirror to our deep seated fear’ that we shun realizing. One can only work towards a healthy relationship when you can look deep within and understand your being.

Reassess: There’s no end to learning, to accept in the light of realization and change for good. Even the wood at our home needs polishing to shine bright and in the process keep away the rut. Your ego cannot be your covering to hesitate the change.

Your treasured photo album: Remember those moments that has got locked in your memory of your beautiful time together. Have you made efforts to make more of them? Our relationship too needs nourishment. Revisit them or better create new ones. Why don’t we question our stagnation? Our immobility is antagonistic to our agile relationship which too wants to grow. Remember it takes a full bloom rose to spread its fragrance. A bud is just a hope.

Time is triumphant: Time is the most precious gift one can give. With passage of time it is only your conversations that hold you close. Man’s dire need is to connect, associate by language, feelings, emotion or silence. Expectation for gifts is basically an expectation of your time that you gave in thinking and arranging for it. It is the gesture that is valued the most. Spend time to understand each other, share your thoughts and speak your mind. There’s no better way to connect.

And the Mantra: is to give each other space. Distance is a thing of being secured in your life and having faith on yourself and in your relationship. Our anxiousness and anticipations messes up the whole scene. There is no stopping to the building up mind, into hypothetical. The net can only get entangle if left to be. Distance helps you know your relationship better. For the book anyways cannot be read if kept too close.

– Anuradha Bansal

 

5 Takes: Were you being really lazy? Check out before it’s too late.

The slider of your week gets you to a sluggish start. Here’s a mini poetry to that:

Mondays are blue,

Wednesday are screwed

But Fridays look true!

And wish if you could arrest the weekends. Even before they come they are over. And for them who get only Sundays (which I guess happens only in India…la la la) for them it is all about being in the trauma. Half the day you are asleep and the other half in the thought that the day is just gone by.The week just pulls and drags you through. And leaves you exhausted physically and mentally, emotionally too (and you know why). Leaving many in self doubt that-

Am I getting burnt out?

Why am I so lazy?

Why I hate myself and my job?

Why am I missing on life? And you can further introspect to add on to the list…..

Let’s take a look:

What are the symptoms?

-Feeling mostly exhausted and sleepy even when daybreak snares at you.

-Always in a mood to procrastinate work.

-You need a break even before you start working.

-You are found mostly in the social media circuit- Facebook, Twitter, the whole bunch during your work hours.

-You love walking to your coffee break area and wish others too stop by along with you for a chat

-You find solace in being a sadist.

-Steal yourself from shouldering added responsibility.

-You are smart with excuses and yet appear serious.

-You get bouts of mood swings and sway in depression often.

-And not to mention your inner scream for the next weekend turn up.

Choose your pick from the exhausted list. The point is to realize where you are heading to.

Do you have the required expertise?

How well do you know what you do? That itself will indicate you further if you are on the right track. Either you would have chosen the field of your in-depth knowledge or in due course learnt the tricks of the trade out of your interest. Practical knowledge is much sought after. And if you still think yourself left behind, you know whom to blame.

So what is it that excites you?

Know where you are pulled the most. What you considered just as your hobby, part time or a side business could be your true calling. Just give it a thought. Every person has a different motivational magnet to get attracted to. Don’t worry about the resources; they will fall in place once you have channelized your energy. I am sure you would have discovered it time and again for yourself.

Every excitement wouldn’t reach it’s exaltation point. Why so?

Perseverance and continuity is the key. I didn’t mention discipline purposely. If you really love what you do you wouldn’t need to be serious enough to watch out the yardstick. You would be before time without the alarm. Just liking wouldn’t take you far; you would need your energy drink to get the wind mill rotate.

Decide how important it is for you?

That no one would be able to tell you. Ultimately your work defines you.

Then ofcourse you have just one life.

I would love to jerk you with this and get you a hit. To end it all, there’s just one thing at the end and that is- You have just one life to live. Your time is limited if you have so much to do. But then – ‘Less is never less and the more is never more’. What would be the quality of your life if you spent it repenting devoid of energy and enthusiasm?

Wake up to your call and you wouldn’t know the last time you were being lazy.

– Anuradha Bansal

 

Fly fly up in the sky, if you’ve gift of the gab then why should you shy

  Effective communication has always grabbed your attention. You believe it intuitively without me saying much. You would have secretly admired those who have inspired you on the podium stand. Marketers and salesman would have been successful with you and the one that explained well became your favorite teacher. Even the law of nature thunders before lightening it up. How eagerly you would have waited to hear your sweetheart and wished you never fought only because you were getting to see each other too often. Employees who work out of home individually in isolation would vouch for a great relationship, which they share with their colleagues. Ofcourse it depends on your rapport building ability and the warmth you extend, but much has to do with your effectiveness in expressing yourself.

Like food which depends a lot on heat and it’s science. So does communication with its timing – grab the sense with your favorite comedian in mind. How much you must be admiring their comic timing. The success lies in the appropriateness of your response. This in turn is gestalt to other elemental aspects.

For the full leap communication cycle to take place you would first need to fine tune to yourself. Words spoken are just the vehicle you ride upon, but your tone, intention and expression is much like your inspiration to travel. It was a much thought of circumlocution to relate.

The five senses of communication viz- listening, , speaking, writing, presenting and socializing gives you enough vent volt to your expression medium. Oh did you mind- I started the order with ‘listening’?

Listening : For the success in your reason you would need to get your heart beat in your ears and unplug your mind rumination. Let the cows chew it over and over again. You would be better off keeping it plain and simple. All I mean is let your brain stall from fetching its response and just let loose to listen. You are not expected to jam the session with your rap. Your hold would instead earn you unsaid credibility of a reasonable thinker.

Thought webbing: A silent mind would be better equipped to mind map a message structured enough to impress the one in captivation. Enthrall, inspire and direct – there wouldn’t be an escape.

Writing: Let the ink imprint your essence just so binding to the reader’s mind. Strategize your writing just the way you did your tattoo. Yes, it’s that important. Your words and the punctuating dramatization would screen the show for you. Do not blame if you couldn’t get a full house.

Presentation: Mind your preparedness, be proactive to people management, respect your and others space and personify your boardroom etiquette and you would be a show stellar.

Social Media: How could you be left behind with so much of a hullabaloo. Not that being away from the uproar would be douching in any way. But if you engage do it the right way, else it would harm you more than doing well to your social presence.

– Anuradha Bansal

 

Time Management is a fallacy

Yes you heard it right! Did you think you could play around with the number 24. You know you can’t, Man no matter how mightier might have become but surely not enough to play around with it. Even Christopher Nolan couldn’t think about it as yet. So where does the scope of managing the Time comes from? You have what you have, so how is it that few others are able to do so much more being in the strict purview. Well so the question that we need to ask is- do we need to manage ‘Time’ or is it to manage ‘Self’?

Time would be 24 hours take it in your stride or be left behind. What you actually need is ‘self management’ and that ofcourse doesn’t just entail you motivating yourself. There is much more to it.

Did you start your day well? The tone and temperament you set for yourself just in the beginning sets the day ahead. Massage your muse head, with your inspirational afflatus. Trust me you would derive your energy from this. Think how much sorted you would be when you know how to go about the day ahead.

Prioritize and you wouldn’t need further planning? Life throws many an option, no wonder there’s lot to be tempted. The deal is to make your decisions- right or wrong; we aren’t discussing it as yet. Once you know what needs to be given importance to and what can wait, you wouldn’t need to bog your head down to manage your ‘self planner sheet’ to that micro managing level. Afterall what is the point in living a life wherein time rules you than the other way round?

Keep your smartphone charged- you would need it often to check your milestones. Be motivated time and again with another tick on the list. Your smartphone would also trouble you with pseudo crisis but then they can act as breather as well. So just don’t be too hard on yourself, allow those extra inches of cloth to your tailor made suite, you never know when you end up bloating should you let go.

Plug and Play- That’s convenient, isn’t it? So it is only in letting yourself loose with your strings attached. Wandering is good provided you get back home before its dark. An over stressed mind is a looser anyways. So just don’t be too strict with your Priority Matrix.

Too sweet is your way to be diabetic- And you thought you could please as many. That ofcouse is being impractical. Know your boundaries and you would know when it is a sixer. Then if you jump, all you would end up is hurting yourself. It is at times good to say ‘NO’ to save both ends. You might not be appreciated off hand but for sure it would serve you well in times ahead. It is always better to under-commit than to over-commit. For that you would need to be smart enough to budget proof.

Life is a potluck – So the mantra is enjoy. Balancing your crisis, persevering quality and leaving room for interruptions and trivia would give a nice stir to your sumptuous day.

And then you could spend the rest of the day with your favorite book before you retire for the day– The advantages are many since you would save yourself from the burnout, global warming is enough for your warm up! The restful mind is sharp and steady, balanced and progressive.

– Anuradha Bansal